Cranial Dungitis is an acute condition in which the cerebrum becomes unnaturally yet firmly embedded within the anal orifice.
Millions of people suffer this malady, yet few recognize the symptoms. Fewer still seek treatment. Many are unaware that they have this disease and that it is slowly destroying their ability to maintain a normal lifestyle. If not treated and properly diagnosed, the condition may become chronic. This condition can be contagious, but no known consistency has yet been determined as to the level of exposure that must be maintained to contract the disease. If left untreated, Cranial Dungitis may result in a permanent excremental thought process.
If you know someone who you believe might have Cranial Dungitis, or if you'd like additional information about this serious pandemic, please contact 1-900-SHT4BRNS.
44 comments:
Paint yer bald spot?
i would probably suffer from this disease were it for the fact my finger gets in the way. not many people can do this without vaseline better get a good supply.
Mornin' Rose. Is this the same affliction as Rectal Corneal Inversion? If so, I am glad to know there is a place to call for help. I suffer from acute attacks from time to time, however, know a few for whom this is a chronic condition.
Good morning, all!
A lot of criminals & politicians suffer this disease.
When Bill Clinton said he didn't inhale & expected us to believe it? Classic symptom of CD.
The folks who stole the Loomis Fargo truck years ago, then ruined their perfect getaway with boob jobs & leopard print carpet? Advanced CD.
Sometimes, CD is precluded by Foot in Mouth Disease, but not always.
AWs site is full of CD sufferers. Doing donuts with stolen trucks? Could be CD. Google refusing to give the Feds their records? Google's way of saying, "We know you have CD."
It's important to understand that Brain Farts are not a symptom of Cranial Dungitis.
Is this where the term ButtHead came from?
I think my neighbor has this. I knew she had her head up her a*s, but I didn't know it was disese. I feel bad for being mean to her now.
Is it fatal?
Wednesday night at ballgame Sheriff Noneck was asked to remove Jeff Boggs from the game.He refused. IF the girls season is sanctioned, we can blame Boggs and Poopy for spoiling a great season and top playoff berth. Certainly the head up butt desase
I got no neck, but I'm a helluva guy.
I'm a mean bada*s, lemme tell ya why.
I catch them bad guys & haul 'em in.
If they get out, I'll arrest 'em again.
I got no time to be harrassin' my friends
Jeff's my bud - knows where I been.
Them lil' ol' girls ain't got no vote,
Can't worry 'bout them, so y'all take note.
I'm a 'lected official, I got plans.
Got an agenda - can't worry 'bout bans.
Gotta 'rest REAL creeps, not loud mouth jerks.
Gotta get re'lected - I like the perks.
So y'all shut up! Just leave me be!
Get off my back! Quit pickin' on me!
I'm Da Man! I'm Da Law!
Gotta worry 'bout my pension, not basketball!
Hey Schoonny can't help it cause he has CD and he's can look in windows or anything like that. Been wasting space and air since he was hatched (crow poop on stump) so why not cotinue. Thot for today
DORMITORY:
When you rearrange the letters:
DIRTY ROOM
PRESBYTERIAN:
When you rearrange the letters:
BEST IN PRAYER
ASTRONOMER:
When you rearrange the letters:
MOON STARER
DESPERATION:
When you rearrange the letters:
A ROPE ENDS IT
THE EYES:
When you rearrange the letters:
THEY SEE
GEORGE BUSH:
When you rearrange the letters:
HE BUGS GORE
THE MORSE CODE:
When you rearrange the letters:
HERE COME DOTS
SLOT MACHINES:
When you rearrange the letters:
CASH LOST IN ME
ANIMOSITY:
When you rearrange the letters:
IS NO AMITY
ELECTION RESULTS:
When you rearrange the letters:
LIES - LET'S RECOUNT
SNOOZE ALARMS:
When you rearrange the letters:
ALAS! NO MORE Z 'S
A DECIMAL POINT:
When you rearrange the letters:
IM A DOT IN PLACE
THE EARTHQUAKES:When you rearrange the letters:
THAT QUEER SHAKE
ELEVEN PLUS TWO:
When you rearrange the letters:
TWELVE PLUS ONE
AND FOR THE GRAND FINALE:
MOTHER-IN-LAW:
When you rearrange the letters:
WOMAN HITLER
Yep! Someone with waaaaaaaaaaay
too much time on their hands! (Probably a son-in-law)
Unanimous
elkrivergirl we all know you have a grudge against randy. after all he is your ex-husband as well. just because you want to see him in jail does not mean that everyone else does. YEs, randy does stirr some crap but that his his other ex-wife's job to mouth off about what happens at her place. not yours. let up on the vendetta and perhaps things will become clearer for ya.
YOU GO, GIRLFRIEND!
elkrivergirl is a classic example of people who can rise above & overcome their genes (though the other half of hers are pretty darn decent!!).
To ElkriverGirl, You are not his youngest daughter Jama. I know for a fact who you are because you told me you were elkriver girl. Jama should not get the blame for how you feel about Randy. How could let your daughter take the blame for your words? Remember you told me who you were.
I agree with everything elkrivergirl says cause I know how Randy is. He belongs in jail. He is psychotic, he is a drug addict. I personally know Randy and his family. He treats them like shit. He mentally abuses his oldest daughter. He acts as if his youngest daughter does not exist. And as for his son, he may not treat him as badly as he does his daughters, but he treats him bad none the less. If everyone knew Randy, like I know Randy, they would feel just the same as I would. Vicky W. needs to grow some balls and put this man where he belongs. Or is she not smart enough to know, that she will not get a nights peace as long as she is alive? Elkriver girl, I completely agree with everything you have to say no matter if you are Lisa or Jama.
I guess the above named people fit the profile of CD
By the way I mean JRS and VLW
Elkrivergirl or woman I sympathize with you and also have some good advice as it will often work on Idiots. God mad big girls and he made little girls but rest assured he also made Equalizers for Dads with Dumb A** Disease also. Go down to K-Mart or wally world and buy each one of you a Little Slugger Baseball bat and when Mr. Idiot comes around use it on him. It only takes one time to stop abuse and if you break his legs "so be it" you will get some restful nights while he's layed up. As for his ex that calls and won't file charges I suppose she deserves whatever comes her way but she can buy a Little Slugger also. Enough of anything is enough and abusing someone in anyway can be dealt with accordingly.. Most abuse ends up with someone going to the funeral home or jail but a broken leg works very well most the time. Only treatment for a druggie is what they understand so You Go Girls ....
Well, then. I guess I AM the one who opened up the SHT4BRNS thread, huh? teeheehee
Femaleballbuster, FYI - we use cute little * & + & stuff like that in strategic places here instead of writing out the whole "bad word," OK? My kids read this stuff & for whatever reason, sh*t doesn't seem so "bad." ("Cojones" is much better than "balls," don't you think?)
Randy's always been a bit ... different. BUT, at some point, he had some good in him. You can't be a total waste of human life & still be able to help create the children he has.
His "legacy" will not be the actions of the past few years, but rather the happiness & success of his children & those who come after them.
Word of advice: P*ss off elkrivergirl/woman at your own risk. >;-}
Morning, Rose. For whatever reason, some people are just mean spirited and like making other folks miserable. On the other hand, some people who do mean things and make other people miserable are emotionally or mentally (maybe both) unstable. I happen to think Randy Schoonover falls into the second group. I have known him for a very long time and if I witnessed a parent driving by the church where my brother was getting married threatening to shoot up the place, I might be a little nuttier than I am already. I happen to think all of us are a product of the environment we grew up in to some extent. Some of us can overcome the negatives on our own and lead productive lives, but some of us need professional help. Of course, there will be a lot of folks disagree with me on this but that's okay. This is just my opinion. I am certainly not using this to excuse Randy's unacceptable behavior or to minimize it's effect on his victims. I already have a Louisville Slugger and would not hesitate to use it should I be the target of such behavior whether I thought the person was off kilter or not. So enough on this subject. Have a great day. Stay warm.
FYI on AW's site advisory page under RW is a new bill and law on abusing someone so dropby and read it if you fall into that category..
RWs bill/law applies only to abusers convicted of their abuse. Until victims start pressing charges, nobody gets convicted of anything. Abusers do NOT stop abusing. They gain more confidence the longer they get away with it. You can't press charges if you're dead.
Rose this is for you. I changed my name. Rosie, I am sorry for the bad words, I was mad yesterday at Randy. It wont happen again. Elkriver woman. I will get in contact with you.
I would like to make it perfectly clear that I am in no way either related to or a friend of VW. Like I said previously, I personally know Randy and his family and think very highly of his children and his 1st ex-wife. I will start to watch my language but yesterday, I was too peeved to think rationally. Randy oversteps his boundary limits where certain people are concerned. I am personally connected to this situation. I totally agree with you Rose where you said that Randy could not be a total waste of human life and create the kids he has. But harrassing those kids is a different story and it seems that the oldest girl gets it the most and alot harder than the other kids. All three of his kids have different forms of faults but all in all they are good kids. We can all be thankful and blessed that none of the kids turned out to be like their grandmother Hortense. LOL :) To bad we can't say the same about Randy. I feel that where I am personally connected that I can express my opinion. If I was not personally connected in the way that I am, I would sit here and keep my fingers from moving along this keyboard. I am extremely proud of ElkRiver Woman and Elk River Girl for starting this conversation on Randy. It needed to be done. Everybody who has posted on here, can not sit there reading this and not admit that Randy has problems. Because we all know he does. Maybe sometime soon down the road we can hear from his other 2 children and see what their opinions on their father is. I can almost guarantee you that at least the oldest one will agree with me. And her mother. This is better than therapy and cheaper too. LOL :)
LOL Oh, man, "therapy" indeed!! I can't tell you the number of comments I've sat here & typed up, just to re-read, laugh my head off & delete. Then again, sometimes ya just gotta hit the ol' Publish button & say the heck with it.
The old name didn't really bother me - I just like the word "cojones." LOLOL
Personally, I think it's sad that ... whatever has happened to Randy has happened. Then again, at this point, he probably doesn't even realize what he's lost, let alone have any appreciation for it.
I once had a boss tell me (repeatedly), "Time wounds all heels." Of course, he was talking about something totally different, but I think in the end, it's the same thing.
The Schoony kids have all suffered because of him, but they've all hiked up their drawers & made it through the day. Meanwhile, he's still wandering around with his drawers around his knees, clueless, & there's not much anybody can do about it.
He needs serious help.
While checking out AW's Advisory Page at the suggestion of Anonymous, I also read "Legislative Update from the Desk of Shirley D. Love".
"A House Bill would raise the tax on a pack of cigarettes from 55 cents to 95 cents with an 8% increase on smokeless tobacco. Sponsors feel it would be a deterrent to youth smoking, making tobacco products cost prohibitive."
Does anybody think this will make any difference at all in whether youth uses tobacco or not? I don't.
I started smoking cigarettes in the early 60's when I was in high school. The $1.00 per day my parents gave me for lunch money was more than enough then for a Pepsi, bag of peanuts, and a pack of cigarettes. Now the same three items will take the biggest part of a ten-dollar bill depending on what size Pepsi I buy and what brand of cigarettes I buy. I gave up the peanuts. lol. They're bad for my health. Too many calories and too much salt.
oh my world rose. His pants down around his knees, not a picture that I needed to see in my poor brain. What a horrorifffffic sight. Oh God im going blind.....heeeellllllllppppppppppp Meeeeeeeeeeeeeee:) By the way didn't randy have a problem running naked in his neighborhood a while back? Seems like I 'member something about that.
Ugh. I'm going to have to start blocking out my automatic "mental picture" ability before I ever come in here to read the stuff that's being posted. :S LOL
"A House Bill would raise the tax on a pack of cigarettes from 55 cents to 95 cents with an 8% increase on smokeless tobacco. Sponsors feel it would be a deterrent to youth smoking, making tobacco products cost prohibitive."
I hate to be the one to say it but this is the DUMBEST idea I have ever heard of now and years past. Our legislatures have certainly gone Braindead if they think this is a solution to anything at all. It will just add more tax money for them to have ate their every beck and call to have more Booze parties while in their 60 days session. I for one do not drink, smoke nor chew but I do run around with mean women from time to time so this tax doesn't affect me in any way except to P*** me off to think that our government is so dumb to think up such a scheme.. How many out there will it stop from buying cigarettes or tobacco products... Not the first time they have done this and the price per pack or cartoon just went up is all that it has or will accomplish.. Like petro products there are some thing you can't and won't do without in life. Senate and house members should wake up sooner or later as this is the real world and where theres a will theres a way and if its gonna happen it will whether its $3 a pack or four if they want them they will get them anyway the only thing is most will cross the state line to buy and the state will lose the entire 95 cents a pack instead of 55 cents they are loosing now. Throw money at a dead horse is what they know and understand. All you kids out there smoking or otherwise remember these Idiots when you are old enough to vote.
Ya know, I just heard that WV is one of the largest contributors to the PowerBall fund. We buy more Lottery tickets than any other state, yet we have the least amount of money.
Some day, drive around Charleston & vicinity & check out the cars on the school parking lots. The crappy ones belong to the staff - the really nice, high dollar ones belong to the students & Mommy & Daddy are paying for them.
Kids can and will find money to pay for their cigarettes. And their beer. And their drugs. And whatever else kids want to do & for the most part, Mommy & Daddy will be their funding source.
Um ... sorry for the undesirable visual on the drooping drawers. LOL But it got the point across, didn't it? BAHAHAHAHAHA
Morning Rose. Well, we've come a long way from the original post, however, there is some very good stuff here. Some funny, some sad, some ridiculous. That's why I love your blog. Glad to see I'm not the only one who thinks the House Bill proposal to up the taxes on cigarettes and other tobacco products is idiotic. Your point about the kids and their vehicles applies right here in good ole Clay County too. Just stand and watch sometime as the cars, trucks, and SUV's cruise through town when school lets out. With caps on backwards and/or long highlighted hair (highlights paid for by parents), smoking their cigarette, the kids cruise home from school in style listening the deafening expensive sound systems that I'm pretty sure don't come as standard equipment.
sirhenry, let's not go suing the Power Ball advertising folks. They tell us like it is. I know that the odds are against me and am pretty sure most folks who buy tickets do too. I don't have a lot of money to gamble away but I spend $2 a week on Power Ball. One ticket for the Wednesday drawing and one ticket for the Saturday drawing no matter how much the jackpot might be. I am not so stupid that I don't know that some people spend money to buy tons of tickets which they really can't afford to do but I don't think suing the advertisers will stop them. I hope you aren't one of those "sue-happy" folks. Lord knows we have enough of them. They keep the Courts clogged with nonesense and take time away from trying to get the really bad guys behind bars.
Whoa!! This is getting very long so better shut up now.
Have a good day, Rose, and everyone. Just heard on the scanner that school is going to be on 2-hour delay this morning. Nothing like waiting until the last minute to make a decision. Some of the buses have already headed out on their route. Good grief!!!
Good morning, all!!
I'd just gone in to wake the kids when I happened to turn on the news & found out about the school delay. Normally, it takes awhile to wake them up. Now I know all I have to do is say, "Never mind, there's a 2-hour delay" & they'll pop right up, wide awake & shouting. LOL
brulz, don't forget the tattooes, earrings, nose rings, belly rings, etc. I'd say the cost of a tattoo would buy an awful lot of smokes if a kid was willing to change his priorities. Or just leave the "M" off of "I love Mom" or whatever.
One of these days, I'm gonna win the PowerBall & prove just how stacked the odds are. I can't even remember to buy a ticket, so when I win, you'll know the odds can, indeed, be beaten!! BAHAHAHAHAHA
Ready for a new topic? I think I am. brulz, I want you to take note that there are over 30 comments this time & a questionable subject matter - no mention of you-know-who! I guess Schoony outranks her. >;-}
Didn't mention it because afraid of jinxing us. lol. But refreshing nonetheless. Sure would like to see RS get turned around. If not for problems, is not a bad person at all. I think still it's a product-of-environment thing with him, but since I'm no shrink, could be wrong. Will be checking back later to see what's next.
Not anon, Rose. Don't know why I did that on last comment about you know who. lol. Too early in morning I suppose. Duh!!
just returned from clay. looked around. everyone who works to support the gov. was working. couldn't find a courthouse employee anywhere.
I notice, according to your school calendar, in Clay County, that there was no school on Martin Luther Kings birthday, but there is school today on Presidents Day. Why is that?
CB
Amen!
CB
Oh, dear. How sad. Such stone-age racist thinking. I'm no bleeding-heart liberal, but these comments really make me more sad than mad.
So disappointed in you, southern boy. But I hardly think it matters to you. Such an attitude. I hope you don't have children to pass this poison on to. I get a little tired of the whining minorities, but I also get a little tired of the whining dead beat white folks in and around Clay who sit on their behinds waiting for their check and acting like they own the world and I really can't see where the minorities of the country are any worse than our tax-supported leeches.
this was on jail birds website:
Marina is not currently incarcerated nor is several of these individuals listed.
If justme could read all Marina's charges were "dropped" and she was being harassed from local law enforcement.
This blog is harassment and stalking to those that are no longer incarcerated or are sexual offenders.
You cannot list sexual offenders with the intent of "harassment" and it is clear that "harassment" is present.
If you or a loved one is listed on this blog, I urge you to contact Sheriff Holcomb at 587-4760 or Prosecutor Samples at 587-2702 to file charges.
They will have to take your statement and blogger will have to release the owners records via a supeona. If the owner is found to be a false identity, the IP address will be used to identify the individual.
Since we're taalking about SHT4BRNS, queers, and other lowlifes, it's time to bring MP back.
She comes on all thses blogs as Anon now bcause she knows everybody hates her. She aint got the cojones to leave her name.
I don't like her. I didn't like her when we were kids I didn't like her in high school and I don't like her now.
She wnats people to believe that lady she slapped 'had it coming' but the truth is she's always been a bully. She's got a mean streak in her plumb to hell. She's got a mouth on her that no rapper would even talk out of. Plus, she's got a big a*s.
I knowfor a fact she's stalked people before and I know for a fact she's threatened people before. That's why I'm not leaving my name.
You all don't know MP like some of us do. You think its funny she slapped somebody but what if all them people hadn't been there as witness?
If I had to chose between MP for a neighbor or a house ful of black queers on welfare, I'd take them to the bank to cash their checks.
LMAO. Rose, see what you went and done. You jinxed us. To use your words: BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA.
LMAO!
WOW!
Now that's throwin it down!
It's a wonder you like MP. She's in a minority class of her very own kind.
Certainly does. The Cranial Dungitis All Star League.
oh great now the jailbird site is gone. Thanks alot whiney pants whoever you are!
LMAO! Good gravy! WTF happened here?? LOL
I can see a new post is in order .... BAHAHAHAHAHA
Jailbirds is gone???
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