Do you know a child who's a little rowdy? Hyper, maybe? Can't pay attention? How many children do you know who have been diagnosed with ADD or ADHD? How many of those children are taking medication for their disorder? Ritalin was the most commonly prescribed medication for children for 20+ years. By the standards of the Federal government's Controlled Substance Act, Ritalin falls into the same drug class as cocaine and crystal meth - Schedule II substances. Over the past 5 years or so, dozens of new drugs have hit the market to "treat" these children. Stimulant vs. nonstimulant; liver damage vs. mind-altering; stressed parents vs. non-stressed teachers. Given the ease with which these drugs can be obtained, is it any wonder there's such a drug problem in our society?
The beauty of small town living...
- ROSE
- Bomont, West Virginia, United States
- When you have no idea what you're doing, somebody else will ... or at least make something up & run with it.
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26 comments:
Those darn kids are being raised by those darn kids who never had a good dose of old-time discipline. No, I don't believe in beating kids, but a little old-fashioned spanking or switching might make going to any public place a little more tolerable. Had I ever thrown a fit like a I see kids throwing in public, running around a store, grabbing stuff, why I wouldn't have been able to sit down for a week. That was all the "drug" I needed.
My sister has a kid thatshe decided a few years ago was just completely uncontrolable. Put him on medicine and now 3 years later is uncontrolable again and they are trying to find another medication.
I have seen her let her son get away with murder then decide out of nowherethat what he had been doing was "against the rules". That would lead to what i consider an excessive punishment and usually an embarrasing one.
If she would cut out her nonsense and grow up. Treat her kids fairly and like humans--I believe kids need a certain level of respect and decency to mature right. That her son would be an enjoyable young man to be around.
Todays parents need to get more advice from their own parents and not think that parent is just trying to stick their noses where they dont belong!!
Seems anymore if you try and discipline your kids, especially in public, you can get arrested or at the very least a visit from CPS. But that wasn't really the question. Wasn't there some case a while back where the parents were charged with neglect or abuse or some such ridiculous thing for not putting their child on a medication for ADD/ADHD? There are plenty of techniques (besides discipline) for kids who have attention problems that work. BUT they take time and they take patience. Drugs are so much easier and to most people who are so quick to ply them their children, they are also free.
As mentioned, I believe that a lot of parents are "wishy-washy" in their disciplining methods. (I've been guilty of that myself a time or two.) It's hard for a kid to learn right from wrong if a certain behavior isn't wrong every time they do it. For instance, kids know that when they're out in public, Mommy (or Daddy) will often overlook their behavior to save embarrassing themselves. The punishment should be the same, not matter where they are or who's around. (Punishment doesn't necessarily mean a "whipping" every time they do something either.)
I also agree that it takes time and patience to teach a child things like respect and how they should act in the company of others. It's something that needs to be a constant in that child's life. Otherwise, they're just going to go on doing whatever it is that they want, however they want to do it.
My four year old son is hyperactive. He's constantly on the go and into something. Part of that is just being a kid. I believe that the other part is boredom and curiosity. Anyway, as a single Mom with two kids and no outside help, sometimes it does get overwhelming.
However, I do not believe that giving a child medication to "fix them" is right. I believe that medication takes away a part of that child's identity. A parent must find things that will truly interest the child, things that will keep them busy as well as learning something at the same time. Then, you'll see a longer "attention span" start to emerge in most cases. They'll also calm down a lot if they find something that piques their interest. Sure, it takes time and work, but isn't that the case with anything of value??
We should also look back to how the older people raised their children years ago. Children of past generations were raised to be responsible and learned respect at an early age. They were given chores to keep them busy and to teach them work ethics early on. You never heard tales of "hyper" kids from way back when. They were too busy to be hyper. LOL They knew not to talk back or to rebel against their parents because they respected them. I'm sure that they got into things and did rebel at times, but not like kids do today. It all falls back to that one little word that holds such great meaning....RESPECT. It's the greatest lesson anyone can ever learn.
Good morning, all!
Back in the early 90's (that's 19, not 18), I worked with a lady who was shopping in a card shop in NJ with her daughter & granddaughter. The granddaughter was maybe 4 or 5 & decided to knock all the cards off the shelves. Her mother told her to stop, she didn't, she got her behind swatted. Another lady in the store saw it happen, followed all 3 of them to the parking lot & proceeded to scream at the mom.
Later that evening, the police showed up at the mom's door, arrested her & placed the child with social services - the woman in the parking lot had written down her license plate number & reported her for abuse.
The "situation" was cleared up & the little girl returned within hours, but ...
When my oldest brother was 17 or so & about 6'2", he back-talked my itty-bitty mom, who was sitting on the couch. She told him to get over there & get down on his knees so she could slap his sassy mouth (without getting up, of course). He did & she did. Now THAT is R-E-S-P-E-C-T!
As the parent of 2 rough & rowdy little boys I've been faced with similiar situations with both of them.
Several years ago, it was suggested to me that my youngest was ADHD. He was always going, going, GOING. What I considered to be a normal, over-active BOY SYNDROME apparently had potential to be something else.
Numerous people - especially at school - strongly recommended putting him on "medication" of some sort. ANY sort. Just calm this kid down & do something about him.
I did - I transferred him to another school, where the teachers exerted their authority & the kids were taught mutual respect. This translated into a calmer kid coming home each day, too, since he was no longer being yelled at & punished incessantly at school, which logically translated into all of us chilling out a little.
Had I caved in & listened to all those people, my child would still be on mind-altering drugs whose long-term effects are still unknown.
I don't for a minute deny that phamaceutical intervention is sometimes a necessity. I know a lot of kids who are on these medications, though & every few weeks, some of them will suddenly "zombie out" or "rev up" - that's when it's time to go back to the doc & try some more trial & error because the drug du jour isn't working anymore.
Throughout all of this ordeal with my own child, I yammered about ADHD being a neurological disorder, yet nobody EVER mentioned anything about neurological testing, they all just went straight to the Drug Solution. I preferred the "change your attitude" method.
Statistically, something like 2 out of 10 children under the age of 10 will be diagnosed with ADD or ADHD. My son was previously in a class of 17 kids & I know at least half of them were doped to the gills when they came to school every day.
Obviously, I have issues with this particular topic - I could go on for days. LOL Why "parent" when you can dope 'em up & zone 'em out so you can nap in peace?
Okay so you all are saying that behavioral problems are all either due to lazy parenting or not enough discipline? And any sort of neurological diagnosis is crap given by a doctor who is waiting on the kickbacks he gets from the drug companies?
I tend to speak in generalizations when discussing a topic. As with everything else we encounter in life though, nothing happens the same way in EVERY case. I don't think all behavioral problems are due to lazy parenting or lack of discipline, Anonymous. However, there are a LOT of cases where parents don't put as much effort into it as they could.
As far as doctors' diagnoses, sometimes I think it's too easy for them to say "This kid is hyper and/or has no attention span to speak of. Let's give him/her some medication to fix that." They do so BEFORE trying other methods to help that child or without really delving deep to find the root of the problem.
As a parent I know that there are many times when I just don't know what to do. Where's the manual????
NObody's saying all behavorial issues are caused by lack of parenting. Try this, though. Take your kid to the health dept. in clay & tell them he's hyper. Gaurantee you'll walk okut of there with a prescriptoin for something.
I've been in that situation where I didn't know what to do at times either. I'd say that any person who has children has felt that way at some point and time. It would be nice if they came with a manual though, wouldn't it?? LOL
Don't mean to change the subject, but we're getting all kinds of warnings about this one ...
COMPUTER VIRUS ALERT
New worm relies on old trick.
Promise of dirty pictures could destroy personal documents.
The Kama Sutra computer worm will begin destroying critical files on infected computers Friday. Hundreds of thousands of machines may have the worm lurking within their Windows operating system, ready to be unleashed on February 3 and the third of every month thereafter.
Read more:
http://www.cnn.com/2006/TECH/internet/01/31/kamasutraworm/index.html
The neurological concept is an interesting one. It took my nephew 1 trip to the doctor to be diagnosed with ADHD. Two years and 6 medications later, he still hasn't had any neurological testing to back up his diagnosis. Just a bunch of questions on a form his mother & teacher answered. So yeah, in some cases those diagnosises ARE crap and the doctors are guilty of malpractice.
Another interesting conversation! I have a child who was diagnosed with Aspergers (high functioning autism) about 6 years ago. His attention span is 2 minutes unless the topic is dinosaurs, alien planet or Animorphs. He has been at the same school for the past three years and during the first year he was there it was suggested that I consider the different "drug therapys" (therapys my ass...can I say ass?). I told them that I would not consider that because I was not comfortable giving my child the kind of drugs that require daily intake. I suggested (oh... kindly of course!) that there would be different techniques they could try and if the first one didn't work, they could try another until they found one that worked. There was a lot of hemming and hawing and sideways glances by teachers and other school staff. But they did finally choose a plan called "self directed learning" and that's seemed to work for the most part. It's not a perfect plan, but it does allow him to learn and also allows him to learn how to be responsible for his own school work getting done.
Conversely, there was a child in his class that I was told was indeed medicated and "had different learning expectations". The several times I was in the class room he was pretty much just zoned out each time. He didn't appear to be participating or learning, but by golly he wasn't at all disruptive!
I don't think I'm against medications, but it isn't my first choice by any means. Speaking of which any one have a good drugless cure for headsplitting migraines?
CB
My husband has a cure for migraines. & bellyaches & sore throats & whatever else might ail ya ...
Just some helpful hints to the ones that dont want to use prescribed drugs:
Did You Know That? Drinking two glasses of Gatorade can relieve headache pain almost immediately -- without the unpleasant side effects caused by traditional "pain relievers."
Did you know that Colgate toothpaste makes an excellent salve for burns?
Before you head to the drugstore for a high-priced inhaler filled with mysterious chemicals, try chewing on a couple of curiously strong Altoids peppermints. They'll clear up your stuffed nose.
Achy muscles from a bout of the flu? Mix 1 Tablespoon of horseradish in 1 cup of olive oil. Let the mixture sit for 30 minutes, then apply it as massage oil, for instant relief for aching muscles.
Sore throat? Just mix 1/4 cup of vinegar with 1/4 cup of honey and take 1 tablespoon six times a day. The vinegar kills the bacteria.
Cure urinary tract infections with Alka-Seltzer . Just dissolve two tablets in a glass of water and drink it at the onset of the symptoms. Alka-Seltzer begins eliminating urinary tract infections almost instantly -- even though the product was never been advertised for this use. (Note: Alka-Seltzer Plus Cold Medicine is not the same..and contains aspirin, which can cause stomach bleeding if you have ulcers.)
Honey remedy for skin blemishes... Cover the blemish with a dab of honey and place a Band-Aid over it. Honey kills the bacteria, keeps the skin sterile, and speeds healing. Works overnight.
Listerine therapy for toenail fungus... Get rid of unsightly toenail fungus by soaking your toes in Listerine mouthwash. The powerful antiseptic leaves your toenails looking healthy again.
Easy eyeglass protection... To prevent the screws in eyeglasses from loosening, apply a small drop of Maybelline Crystal Clear nail polish to the threads of the screws before tightening them.
Coca-Cola cure for rust... Forget those expensive rust removers. Just saturate an abrasive sponge with Coca Cola and scrub the rust stain. The phosphoric acid in the coke is what gets the job done.
Cleaning liquid that doubles as bug killer... If menacing bees, wasps, hornets, or yellow jackets get in your home and you can't find the insecticide, try a spray of Formula 409. Insects drop to the ground instantly.
Smart splinter remover...just pour a drop of Elmer's Glue-All over the splinter, let dry, and peel the dried glue off the skin. The splinter sticks to the dried glue.
Hunt's tomato paste boil cure....cover the boil with Hunt's tomato paste as a compress. The acids from the tomatoes soothe the pain and bring the boil to a head.
Balm for broken blisters...To disinfect a broken blister, dab on a few drops of Listerine ... a powerful antiseptic.
Heinz vinegar to heal bruises... Soak a cotton ball in white vinegar and apply it to the bruise for 1 hour. The vinegar reduces the blueness and speeds up the healing process.
Kills fleas instantly. Dawn dish washing liquid does the trick. Add a few drops to your dog's bath and shampoo the animal thoroughly. Rinse well to avoid skin irritations. Goodbye fleas.
Rainy day cure for dog odor... Next time your dog comes in from the rain, simply wipe down the animal with Bounce or any dryer sheet, instantly making your dog smell springtime fresh.
Eliminate ear mites... All it takes is a few drops of Wesson corn oil in your cat's ear. Massage it in, then clean with a cotton ball. Repeat daily for 3 days. The oil soothes the cat's skin, smothers the mites, and accelerates healing.
Quaker Oats for fast pain relief....It's not for breakfast anymore! Mix 2 cups of Quaker Oats and 1 cup of water in a bowl and warm in the microwave for 1 minute, cool slightly, and apply the mixture to your hands for soothing relief from arthritis pain.
Wowee!!! Those are a great bunch of home remedies!!! Thanks!!
I'm trying the Gatorade for the headache. The traditional pain relievers give me a "rebound headache" which is generally worse than what I started with. Incidently did you all know that one of the side effects of most of the prescription migraine medications is a headache? Hmmm.....
CB
Glad to help CB.
LOL SirHenry, that was funny! :P
Scenerio. I'm at the beauty salon for my 4-week color touch-up. In comes a Mom to get a perm. Behind mom is her sister carrying mom's 3-year old. Sister is "babysitting" while mom gets her perm. My salon visit quickly turns into a and hour and a half in Hell. Mom and sister talking constantly paying no attention to the child who is systematically wrecking the salon. My stylist is trying to keep the child away from the many things in a salon take can injure a child.
This particular 3-year old was not a
bratty kid, just bored and curious and not long before I was ready to leave, the child started getting tired and sleepy and then things really started getting unbearable.
Why in the name of heaven did they bring the child in the first place? Sister could have stayed at home and kept the child while mom got her perm.
Obviously, the stylist would then be needing the medication.
Oh, WVChic, "sane" is such a relative term. BAHAHAHAHA
As horrific as your situation sounds, it is encouraging in some way to know that these drugs are, indeed, being used for their intended purpose & proving themselves beneficial.
After retiring 13 months ago, I have been watching the satelite dish(Daystar is one)not too much I hope. The joni Show had Dr Mary Ann Block on to help parents with ADHD children. Dr Block quit her job and went to medical school when she was in her eary 40s so she could help her child.
She has a website: www.blockcenter.com
Her book is No More ADHD-10 steps -No More Ritalin
Daystar just emailed this information to me so I have not looked at the website yet.
My husband and I raised two girls but we have our first grandchild, a little boy, Zachary. Oh God, please let him be healthy! So far he is and his first words seem to be No and Buck for their rescue beagle dog.
When I was a Senior at CCHS, I accidently slammed the door one morning as I was leaving the home to catch the school bus. My step dad said, "you come back here young lady and shut that door right." I was misunderstood and went to school with a bruise on my jaw. Now my step dad was a good man and worked hard to support us. Thats just how children were corrected back then. Rose, here is a quote for all parents here.
If you think my hands are full, you should see my heart.
From liftuphigh in northern Va
Liftuphigh, that was the best quote I think I've ever seen. Thank you very much for sharing it.
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WVChic, I am very glad that the meds help your step-son. I sure hope that in all of this, you have plenty of support for those times when you're at your wit's end.
One word:
THORAZINE
BUDWEISER!
Hey, Dr. Sleeth, you treat MP? Or is that Dr. Anon? Maybe Dr. Bud should so she wouldn't be so mad all th3e time.
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